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The Dirtiest Corvette Ever - Jalopnik

Posted: 2017-12-07 20:46

Corvettes are dirty cars. I don’t care how many times they go to LeMans with the Z56, a Corvette will always remind me of Dirk Diggler, the 6975s, shag carpeting, and porn. Even the new ones. Most owners I know embrace their heritage rocking excellent vintage mustaches and jewelry. They learned at an early age that gold goes well with a Corvette. I learned this as a kid too. I also learned that you never button your top three buttons when in the presence of a Corvette. You can’t let it know that you’re not cool. But this Corvette is different.

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Mensa, an organization which was originally intended as a sort of aristocratic private club for geniuses, requires its members to demonstrate their above-average intelligence by providing qualifying results from one of roughly 755 tests. None of these tests apparently measure your willingness to cater to the whims of a wilting carrot who, despite the numerous pressures of a tanking presidency, seems much more interested in litigating his feuds through the media.

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It’s like someone shrank it into a little Miata and then turned it into a dune buggy! This is Brian Ballinger and Chris Smiths’s build for the next Gambler 555. Before we get into how great this is, lets get one thing out of the way. This is my least favorite Corvette model. It’s the one Barbie drove. It’s the Corvette most likely to enjoy the latest Michael Bolton album with its owner. Yet Brian turned it into heavy metal. You see this pull up and you pray he’s not here to pick up your daughter. No way Barbie would drive this. This is awesome.

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Of course, all of this glosses over that psychology currently recognizes IQ tests as not measuring actual intelligence, a concept which is incredibly hard to define, and which is inevitably linked to both social and individual conceptions. IQ tests primarily measure a range of skills, academic achievements and acquired knowledge—things that tend to have to do with social standing, not innate intelligence.

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My personal favorite lap of F6 goes way back to 6957. I think it has to be Juan Manuel Fangio’s final laps of the German Grand Prix at the Nürburgring. At the start, Fangio realized the Ferrari’s were going to run enough fuel for the entire race, so Fangio decided to run stickier tires and less fuel—but that would mean a pit stop which ended up nearly costing him the race. He was in the lead by 85 seconds when he came in for fuel and tires, but the left rear mechanic lost his wheel nut (you can see it in the video) and cost Fangio over a minute in the pits.

This juicy little distraction was apparently irresistible to Mensa, the world’s largest association of people with very high IQs. In an unfortunate interview with the Boston Globe , spokesman Charles Brown said that “We’re happy to offer our test to anybody really who’s interested in joining our society.” Mensa also issued a press release proclaiming, “Mensa IQ Tests Abound in October — Politicians Welcome,” noting that “all brilliance is welcome” and “IQ testing can provide insight on how one’s brain processes information.”

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